Witnessing & Choosing Joy

A few months ago I had to run to the grocery store to pick up a cake to celebrate a fantastic first week of school with our staff.  I was in a rush trying to get back quickly.  When I got to my car I noticed a guy sitting in the passenger seat of the car next to mine.  He was rocking out... I mean really rocking out to the music blaring from his car radio.  The world around him didn't seem to exist.  I can just imagine the face I must have made... I probably raised my eyebrows making a strange "what in the world are you doing?" kind of face.  To be honest, my first thought was - 'what a weirdo' and then quickly put the cake in the car and headed back to school.

 

 As I pulled away I started thinking about the guy in the car and instead of raising my eyebrows, I smiled and thought, "Wait.  Why did I think he was a weirdo? The guy wasn't hurting anything.  His actions did not impact me or anyone else in a negative way whatsoever.  He was having a good time.  He was being - joyful."

This occurrence has encouraged me to look at a lot of things differently.  I think many of us, me included, sometimes rush to judge others a little too quickly and what's worse than being judgy is being judgy about things that don't hurt or impact us.  It's important to recognize that everyone doesn't find joy in the same things or in the same ways; but that's okay. 

 

This is a silly example but it's an example I used when talking to my boys about this topic.  When you drive around during the holidays you will see lots of festive lights and decorations.  Most are not my style or taste but instead of saying, "Ugh, that's so gaudy!" or "Over do it much?" I choose to remind myself, and my boys, that someone else's taste in Christmas lights and decorations has no negative impact on us and obviously it must bring them joy or they wouldn't have put them up. So now, when we find ourselves being judgy we just say, "Christmas lights" to each other.

 

I guess it's similar to a 'live and let live' attitude but I elect to take it a step further.  I want to be a witness to other people's happiness and choose to find my own joy in witnessing theirs.  I find myself stopping and smiling when I notice others being joyful.  It's a  good feeling.  It makes me feel connected with others and getting the opportunity to share in the joy they are experiencing is pretty special.  It reminds me that joy is all around us - even if sometimes we need to look for it, create our own, or soak in some that someone else is experiencing.

 

Yesterday I was traveling by train and sat across the aisle from a man who, with about two hours left of our 16 hour trip, put a video on his laptop.  He started bursting out laughing at funny parts in the movie.  A few other passengers started looking and shaking their heads- probably thinking he was weird... but I sat back, smiled, and thought to myself, "Christmas lights" and choose to soak in the joy he was experiencing for the last stretch of our trip. 

 

This new year, go out into the world and witness & choose joy!  Spread some, too, if you can!  #beingkindmatters